Tag Archives: trust

I realized I’m a total control freak!

I never viewed myself as a very controlling person. I usually let others take the reins and just settle in my nice comfortable seat of following. Lately though, God has been revealing something to me…that I am a total control freak! I mean, not controlling of others, but of myself. Throughout my life I thought I was doing a pretty okay job at living my life for God when in reality I was making decisions based on myself and what I wanted out of life. God has been pointing out so many areas of my life that are still under ‘my control’.

Unlocking doorI like to think about it like a house. I do feel like I’ve given Him access to quite a few rooms in my house…but I have some locked doors too, the keys to which I have a death grip around..I’ve hidden those keys so well I think that God will never find them! It’s like He’s standing outside of those doors, lightly knocking, waiting to be let in, but it’s just so hard to relinquish that control and hand over the keys! I think sometimes I pretend not to hear the knock and figure it must just be those shutters flapping in the wind again! But honestly, how come it’s so hard to trust God with every part of our lives? I think for me it goes right back to trust. Trusting that He is truly in control of all things (Col 1:16-17) , trusting that He loves me and that He really does have some kind of plan for even me!

I hope and pray that you and I can learn to trust this sovereign God more and more and start loosening our grip on those keys!

The bigger picture

I have spent the last 8 and a half years teaching music in the public school setting.  My last gig, which ended in December due to relocating, was teaching chorus to a bunch of very talented sixth graders.  While teaching, I’d often found myself in situations where I’d tell my students, “Just trust me.”  For example, I’ve taught songs where one of the harmony lines just doesn’t seem to make much sense when sung by itself.  I’d tell my students “Trust me, it might sound a little weird right now, but it will sound awesome when we put it with the melody.”  My students were probably thinking “Yeah, right!  How could that ever sound good?!”  But as time went by and they started hearing how the piece fit together, with each passing rehearsal, I began earning credibility points from my students.

After you start making good on enough of those ‘trust me’ moments, you begin seeing that you’ve built up quite a big bank of points.   My students’ doubt and questioning gradually started being replaced with certainty and trust.  They began realizing that I was on their team, that I was pushing them to be their best, to perform up to their highest ability because from my position, I could see the big picture.

I think trusting the Lord’s a lot like that.  He clearly knows what’s best for us.  After all, He is our Maker and He does have a better vantage point on our lives than we do.  If we begin showing our trust for Him in the little things, He will begin proving His credibility and showing His goodness and we won’t help but to want to come to Him for the big things, too.  My favorite verse, Proverbs 3: 5 & 6, illustrates this.  When we trust Him with our whole heart and fight the urge to try and accomplish things on our own power and wisdom, He promises to make our paths straight.

Straight Path

Gifts in Disguise

There are so many times that I wonder why God hasn’t answered my prayers the way I would’ve liked Him to or as quickly as I thought He should. Too often I think I know what’s best for my life and what I need, but I’m not the one who can see the whole picture. There have been times when I have questioned why God never answered a certain prayer that I had, just to realize later why He never did and I go away humming along with Garth Brooks’ song ‘Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers!’ God knows me so much better than I know myself and loves me more than I know, so why wouldn’t I trust Him? When I haven’t seen God answer my prayers, I need to remember it is teaching me to wait upon God and to trust Him in the darkness. Instead of letting difficulties draw me into worrying, I need to try to see them as setting the scene for God to gloriously intervene. We need to always be actively looking for what God is doing in our lives.

Peace in the New Year

January 4

peaceWe all want peace, don’t we?  I mean, really, all the beauty pageant finalists answer their questions with the desire for ‘world peace’.   (That always cracks me up – it’s such a safe answer.)  But really, our homes, our community, our state, our country, our world would be a much better place to live if there was peace.

What about ourselves, do we have inward peace?  I remember a time when I was full of fear, afraid for my children, afraid for circumstances at work, afraid of just about everything.  During that time something profound happened in just a short little phone conversation at work.

Now, the caller didn’t know that I was experiencing such fear, but she ended the conversation with ‘God’s peace be with you.’  That statement hit me like a ton of bricks.  I thought to myself, that’s it – I don’t have peace, that’s why I’m so fearful, so nervous, so edgy.  I need peace amidst all of the circumstances surrounding me.

We all do, don’t we?  Every time we turn on the TV we hear of shootings like the ones in Newtown, CT, robberies, the fiscal cliff, stock market declines.  It is enough to make us fearful all the time.  But I learned a truth from that phone call years ago.

I need to remember where peace comes from – it comes from God.  I like to think on Scripture to help me internalize and live out my faith.  I wanted to know how to daily experience God’s peace amidst all the sometimes overwhelming non-peaceful things coming my way.

This is the verse I landed on and cling to in these times, ‘You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.’  Isaiah 26 NIV   I know that when I trust God – trust that He is in control, trust that He knows the beginning from the end, trust that He loves me –that He will keep me in perfect peace when the overwhelming circumstances and the bad news of the day come my way.  I don’t just know it, I’ve experienced it.

God’s peace be with you.